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Thursday, March 29, 2007



The Truth about Cats and Dogs

I saw this movie again a week or so ago ( when I drafted the post), I loved this movie the first time I saw it years ago, but this time I saw it in a new light. Do guys really look for the personality and compatibility? Or is an airhead model their dream spouse, this side of the male brain configuration is still mysterious.

Examples of men falling in love with the personality are out there, but you don't see much of them, I see the typical beauty with little to no brains being the prize wife every one is looking for, as a single women I have may fair share of suitor stories, I got really mad when my mom told me what the mother of one " 3arees" told her over the phone I wanted to cancel their visit when I found out, but out of respect to mom I did not ask her to cancel, so what made me so mad ? " smi3na fi 3indek bit 7ilweh " and that translates to we have been told that you have a beautiful daughter!!

Is that what I am a beautiful daughter, they did not say successful, smart, well educated, socially active, philanthropist or even a simple religious. At least religious is what I made for my self not something I was born with (that is not entirely true but you know what I mean). All single ladies can share at least 10 stupid stories like that.

Again and again I wonder is it only physical beauty, family name (and connections) and income the only things, that are driving men in the direction of particular woman? don't they care what does she have between her ears ? Well I'm at my wits end a male input would be much appreciated.

17 comments:

Mais said...

i know what you're talking about -exactly- cuz as you said we all have our share of stories!

I wonder is it only physical beauty, family name (and connections) and income the only things, that are driving men in the direction of particular woman?

i think yes...it has a lot to do with it (from what i'm seeing around these days)

Tamara said...

Desert rose

This is very sad ! I agree with you, but ever happened to soul mates ?

Mais said...

wallahe ya Tamara shayeftelek hal denyeh kela masale7!

having a Canadian passport, good job with high income, rich dad..etc..then you're very much to be a good candidate for the "3aroos" role and will eventually increase ur value!

Tamara said...

I guess I know its true I just don't want to believe it !

Anonymous said...

you reminded me of the joke: the thin string that holds the ears together :)

listen, agollek, there is a serious tradeoff here, what oriental said: having a passport, a paying job and wealthy father does it, but THEN ur too smart, too strong and too successful u scare them away! my brother once told me i will never get married because i scare them away with my success, i answered if someone gets scared away by his wife's succsess, he is not man enough to get married to her!

the other bad side effect, if ur value increases, it means u gotta pay double attention, d3af el nofoos ktar, and they could fool u into marrying them!!! too bad, shoo na3mol, sakatna serna mosh nighsheen, 7akeina serna glal 7aya! :)

Tamara said...

Well ladies we cannot answer these questions, only men can. are you guys afraid of successful women ? do you rather have them as friends and colleagues but not wives.

I would love to know

and life goes on... said...

'ismi3na fy 3indik bint 7ilweh' is nothing compared to a call my mom got from a woman who's looking for a girl to her son.. she said we need her to be 173 cm.. can you believe it? i mean with 173!! so i said why not 172? why not 170? this is what i call rediculous!

I wonder how some of those moms think?! if their sons are precious so are the girls they're calling!!!

Ammar said...

funny how you invited "male input" and ended up with a female pannel discussion, so in accordence with your call, I hereby answer:

you've nailed most of it with your comment about physical beauty, family name and fortunes, this is a reflection of the decadence of our once good hearted society, due to instant found fortunes among other social reasons..simple minded wealthy characters need to control the people in their lives..so they "shop" for beautiful..not smart, the bottom line is that logic states that a building built haphazardly..with weak pillars..is bound to collapse, no matter how beautiful it looks from the outside.

many people are getting divorced soon after they're married..their building collapses with the first signs of wind..because it was built haphazardly.

Mrs. Al Ramahi said...

Honestly yes, this is is the case of many guys .. They don't really care what the girl is, her manners, if she has any relation to her religion, her eduction.. then you come to looks..

Even when people ask around for a bride.. the first thing they ask is: "7ilweh"?

Qabbani said...

Okay..

u want answers ..

simple and easy ..

i had a very wide experience in such things i had 4 sisters two of them are married, well u know how's things in Jordan when it about Shwam Girls and pretty and family
i had sis 16's and the calls u got is starting from now that what really pissed me off....

any way back to sub.. as mom say once to me and am try to "Jess nabedha" talking about girl , she ask is she pretty ?
Re: if she's not
Mom: well if u feel ok with her and want her i cant say any thing
Re: aha sure?
Mom: well i know u i guess she's pretty , at least like US
Re: u know that pretty in family not my style
Mom: i hope she's pretty and bet5af Allh

ur Q's as i see in the post and Comment is :
am kind of different so my answers cant be fol all guys thoughts...
-----------------------------
wonder is it only physical beauty, family name (and connections) and income the only things, that are driving men in the direction of particular woman?

mostly Yes, guys see in TV street and every were pretty EVE even if it fake they SEE IT , many times FEEL it deep , so the first things they want is : like her in my home...
with High life in Jordan many guys Look for :
working wife
with another nationality is much better so they might GO OUT Jordan easy ..
the point of Family become low interested by days if she's WOW then no need to know about her family


To me : is NO not in that way at all am a multi complicated guy so i need something good between the ears to get me well , and as i told mom i need a girl with High IQ , even if she had to do the test to know her IQ , yeah silly i know but i had a big problem in dealing with limited minds ..

not just IQ ,many main things just pretty is not that main one as is good looking and not ugly

the family is very important cuz am going to attach two family together so i need to well choose

---------------------------------

don't they care what does she have between her ears ?

Why , so u can keep argue ? tell me that this is not good and that's better , am the MAN her not U ..

some ppl care as they say i like her thinking way .. but many times the pretty is more powerful

To me i do care in this part much more cuz i need it :(
--------------------------

you guys afraid of successful women ?
kind of YES , cuz if u see that women now share us our work ,male unemployment is 4 times girls, and make a lot of guys sit at home , why ?? cuz the manager had feminine feels , he like to see pretty girls work at him in the company , even in sales and marketings girls get more commissions and sell more so the Man go home she's more powerful in communication than u .. thanks god we still in Technical things in top , but who's know....

women success over man shoulder or benefit, even they deserve it some times but not all time ,

the problem in MEN more not in women they get fast seduction and Say YES to employee a girls with bad CV instead of smart guy ..

u cant deny it ..

----------------------


do you rather have them as friends and colleagues but not wives?

some times YES its much better to be friends and colleagues than wives , cuz wife mean something else mean much more than friend or soul peace , so as friend i wont care if ur 150cm , or 172-73cm , cuz am not dealing with u physically , but when it come to be a wife so we go to look more deep in every thing i like to SEE every day ..
---------------------------

girls problem :

not all religious girl know how to deal with mans mind

not all smart girls know how to be a bit humbleness (tawdo3)

unfortunately

guys in some level they think in married as legal SEX , not as building family or soul peace..

not all men like to talk FREE with there wifes , u find some times that HER friend know much more than HIS wife ,

Sorry it's too long comment i guess am going to edit post it soon : )

hope it give u some answers

PŕōuđPāŀĩ said...

lol @ Qabbani, kul da w katem bi albak yabni! lol

tamara: this is an issue that started with bad2 il khaleeqa! i cant agree more on the hidiousity (if such a word exists) of the matter, a girl's sole purpose in life has become that of looking more than pretty all the time, a smart beautiful girl is more welcome that a smart girl who is average in beauty.. whats even more "on deman" is a beautiful yet dumb girl.. ta ma tghalleb ya3ni :la6em: just a nice accessory on some man's arm :la6em again:

isnt this world crazy!

Tamara said...

Dima

beats me! well I understand that her on might be very tall so he needs someone that would not like a midget beside him...but still they look for things that are out side not inside ...

Ammar

I did get more female input than make but that only shows that this is an important subject for lades.

Your answer is logical from the families point of view, my questions are more about what men think? do they think as their families do ?

Mrs. alramahi

I agree to the most part! the thing is women get grilled if they marry for money or position or even looks, but for men its understandable

Qabbani

Thank you for taking the time to answer my questions, so you agree that most think that way but there are a few men out there that look for something different. I know that families pressure their sons when the time comes for a bride but it all has to do with how much does he want what he wants : )

Dima

I agree with the la6em part : ) its so degrading that a bride is being chosen according how well will she go with the décor of his house !

Qabbani said...

@PŕōuđPāŀĩ

well la ya dada mesh katm wala 7aja , bs da modow3 yali 2li month talk with mom about ,

@ Tamara
in some point Men can go against family wish , specially if the Guy work with his dad or brother's , and really try to avoid such guys, not all guys can go as they want .. so that why alot go with love and be in heaven with her then when it come to be his wife , his mom say NO i didt like her , or what ever , so he stuck and what should i do , lose mom or love? ...

Tamara said...

Qabbani

The thing is that sounds logical how can he go against the whole family ? but when I woman says she cannot go against her family she is giving up on love or she is the one who is lowering her standards or what ever that case may be.

I think any man or woman will get what they want and their families will be okay with it if they wanted it strong enough, because then they will find a way around all obsticles

Anonymous said...

@qabbani, one point, managers who hire girls per se, are not going to start hiring guys if girls sit home, and managers who hire "good" girls, hire "good" guys as well... sooooo, saying that girls work increases unemployment amongst guys is the most historically rediculous EXCUSE guys can come up with, u gotta be GOOD at what u do first, if a girl beats u to it, live with it. i personally want "good" people to serve my community

Tamara said...

Maryam

I agree, this sounds to me : if women don't work, then even the incompetent man will get a job : ) this does not have a big effect in my opinion because as there are bosses who hire incompetent women, there are ones who hire only men ! so it balances out I guess

Miss sea lover said...

i watched that movie over and over, i really wanted to believe that this is the truth, and there r guys who think in this way, up to now, i did not meet "any one" who does not mention "7elweeh" at the 1st of his list when u ask him about his dream girl...and they say...girls don't know how to think...i guess it is the opisit exactly