10 Simple pleasures

Since I have been writing a bit heavy stuff lately, and since I lately noticed the deterioration in my writing skills ! a light subject is a welcome break, I will try and keep it light and avoid following my tendency to over analyze or talk too much. So in response to Dima's tag I'm listing 10 simple pleasures and the rules are as follows:

a. You have to use the picture in my post.b. You have to list exactly 10 points.c. You have to tag 3 bloggers when you are done.


1- Fresh mornings, when the weather is clear and sunny and at the same time has a cool breeze.
2- Cold watermelons
3- Warm blanket, cup of tea and a book in winter afternoons
4- Water, in all shapes and forms and uses from drinking it to rain to swimming all of it !
5- Salt
6- Smiles and laughter
7- Coffee
8- Smell of freshly washed clothes
9- Colors and beautiful patterns
10- Shoes : )

I tag any one who would like to do this : )

Change ...

So sleepy and lazy, then fresh and energetic, then excited and busy, then moved to a kind of a hyper phase, but eventually got to the point of heart pounding excitement, soon after a little bit annoyed and disappointed.

All these moods and a few more I got through since this morning till now. and I thought I was not that moody, guess I was wrong estimating my moodiness. Did you ever notice how one word, one phone call and even one smile can change your mood. The human psyche is so interesting we can be as stable as a rock in the wind and as fragile as an autam leaf.

It takes time to be centered again after and external effect, no matter how stable a person is, it still takes us time to get back to our default state of mind, it varies from one person to another some people need days to recover for others it’s a matter of minutes, most naturally it depends on the external factor itself.

Will we know if something hit us so hard that it bent us out of shape? Will we think it’s a temporary thing, will we notice and know that at this place in time I was changed for ever. It maybe for the better or worse, it may effect how we preserve future events. At certain points we know that we have been forever changed and other changes come gradually like rocks caressed by the constant sea.

One thing for certain we do change, we cannot stop that but we can try to change to the better rather than to the worse.

A walk in the park

Did you ever read a book with someone ? if you did even if you are not in the same physical space with them you feel so close to each other, the idea that the other person is reading the same words and ideas entwines you, this could happen if you are watching a move or a show, or even looking at the starts in the sky at the same time.

There are many levels of intimacy and the most powerful one is the spiritual and intellectual intimacy, it builds a strong friendship and defiantly strengthens a love relationship.

There are many magical moments in life that two people can share, and they don't have to be in the same place, they just have to be together in spirit, which not many people who are together in the same place can claim! I see so many people together but worlds apart.

Another level is two people working for a common goal, the comfort of them thriving for the same thing miles away, gives a sense of security and intimacy that words just fall short to describe.

Some people live their lives never getting close enough to any one, they never took a walk through Shakespearian sonnets, or visited the gardens of " Ibn El-qayem" or knew what the labyrinths of the other persons mind and soul are planted with.

Do you ever wonder

Do you ever wonder how some people effect our lives? How some people feel so close no matter how far they are, and how some people maybe in the same room with us but at the same time be miles away. The effects of different people amazes me.

Some people you need a daily dose of, but others on a daily basis would be a slow and painful death. On other occasions you will meet someone for a short period of time and yet stay forever effected by them, and they stay alive in your heart and mind for ever. others that have been around for ever you would forget the moment they walk out of the door or you hand up the phone.

I get really touched by writers and authors, I would really be impressed by a writer or a thinker and remember them in my prayers, and you may see this silly but I wish I could meet some of them in heaven. It just amazes me how some people are so great that their words reach out for centuries and touch people's hearts and soul in such a profound way.

To try and put your hand on what makes these people so effective, and what makes others so insignificant is impossible, since I may see someone as my air and water and to others s\he would be just another face in the crowd. Yet again there are those people who touch the hearts of every one who comes in contact with them. All I can think of is that it’s a blessing, to us that we have them in our lives or that we have crossed paths with them, but I don't think that they see it as one all the time, or maybe they do.

The Best Job on earth

I was reading today an article that stated the 10 most fun jobs, well most of the 10 did not sound like fun to me so I thought I'd make a list of he 10 most fun jobs to me.

1- Restaurant and movie critic: this was one of the listed in the article and I agree with them, you get to see movies before any one else and you get to eat gourmet food, and write your fiery review, what's not like ?

2-Personal shopper: this again was on the list, I totally agree its in my genes to agree with them. Spend the day shopping with someone else's money, perfect ! I tried that before, someone would give me and my friend cash and ask us to buy them makeup or a present, loads of fun !

3-Trainer: this is my own, trainers after a couple of years have all the material that they need, and just need to update them from time to time, but training people is really fun, you get to travel, meet new people all the time, its not a boring desk job. Besides they make good cash !

4- A cooking show: which includes traveling the world to report on the best foods, this could not get any better, travel and good food and getting paid for it.

5-Travel guide\book writer: again you may have noticed the pattern any thing that includes travel and new places is a job for me.

6-A business owner: it does not have to be a multimillion establishment, but any business that is your own without having a boss is great, I know it will be hard work but it gives you a space for breathing and creativity.

7- A photographer for national geographic: travel the world, take beautiful and interesting photographs.

8- Gardener\florist: spending the whole day in the fresh air, working with trees and flowers is just an amazing thing, or as a florist you get to be creative and work with flowers

9- TV\Radio show host: you get to talk and people listen to what you have to say, choose interesting topics and guests this must be an amazing thing, for me at least since I have a natural talent for talking.

10- Humanitarian Worker: this is my actual line of work, but I work in Jordan, I wish I had my same job but in Africa.

This is not a list of the jobs I could have, but the ones I believe I would enjoy doing, and I did not put in mind what each one pays and if it has stability, since it’s a wish list it's not limited with practicality.

Green almonds


Yesterday one of our American colleagues tries green almonds for the first time in his life. He saw someone selling it on the street and asked us what that is; when we told him they are green almonds he was surprised that we eat them. We got him some and he tried them for the first time, this is not the first time we know that Americans don't know we eat fresh almonds, but this got me to thinking about first times

When was the last time you tasted something new, did something for the first time? We all do new things from time to time even daily, but we let them slip we don't savor the moment and experience they just slide by as if they are something we did a million times before.

You will notice that the world is brighter place with each new smell, taste and experience…enjoy the things around you and don't let them slip away unnoticed and unappreciated.

Stop the Hunt !

This morning I was picked up by a friend, to go to the gym as usual at around 6 am, we pass by the police station on our way. I was telling her about my stolen car when I saw a familiar looking car parked by the station ! so we stopped to get a closer look, and it sure was my car.

Unfortunately it was all mashed up ! it was in such a horrible accident that I cannot believe they were able to get out of it alive. Long story short its ready to go to sleep in car heaven : (

Since I was so cheap and I don't have general insurance! I have to start paying for a new car from scratch ! well money comes and goes and as long as I'm healthy, I don't really care what happens to material stuff.

PS: I will add the photos of what she looked like after the accident soon

My Car has been stolen !

(amended)
Dear Friends my car has been stolen sometime between last night and early this morning,( al7amd lilah)….I have reported it stolen at the police station but some how I have the feeling they are not going to loose sleep over it!

We have been informed that sometimes some young guys steel a car for the night, use it until they finish the fuel and then dump it wherever! So if you guys can keep an eye out while driving for my car, and let me know if you find it I will really appreciate it.

It may not be the best car out there but its mine, and I would like it back if possible.

It’s a silver 1991 Mitsubishi hatchback the license plate number is : 673119, and it has one of those things to attach a trailer on I'm not sure what they are called by you have probably seen them around on the back of cars. I live in "Jandaweel " hassan Khawaja Street, so it could be possibly be in that area or Bayader Wadi Al seer, 8th circle.

Please help me find my car !

PS: I cannot believe I don't have any pictures of my car ! this is a look a like : ( well at least you can tell what the car looks like

Mom's advice

I for one did not take this generic mom's advice, I bet you have heard this one before. "Marry a man who loves you more than you love him " I beg to differ mom, but evidently one of my best friends took it to heart. I got a call from her yesterday saying you know your mom is right! I poured in examples of people who fell pray to this wide spread advice, "no good comes out of that" I said

She was really considering accepting this guy's offer of marriage even though she has no feelings towards him, he obviously loves her, but she only respects the guy he is a great friend she says. Well I cannot really get how people will marry another person that they don't love, I'm not the one to tell that you have to be head over heels for the man, but at least to be warm towards him, I know that married life is different than the pink glasses phase, but how dim will it look if you did not love the person to start with, if you did not have a fluttering heart and butterflies in your stomach period, I cannot imagine what your relationship will look like , ten years down the road.

Since she was torn, my advice is to talk to him for a while and go out with him- before you go re-check who's blog your reading- I will like to tell you that this an accepted practice in Islam, it does not mean go out with tons of people and settle with one of them 3 years later, but rather if you have someone who already wants to marry you, and you are not sure you can have a few phone conversations and to go out with him to a public place chaperoned that is! This came as a surprise to her and I bet to all of you as well.

The shocker for me was that she was reluctant to do so, what ! you were torn to marry the dude or not, and now you don't know if you can live through a few phone calls ! I don't know how smart people can be this stupid !

Tamara Main time

Today in planet Tamara it’s the 15th of Apr, besides it being payday the 15th bears no particular meaning. Today I have written all the payments cheques dated 15th of Apr ! boy I would have been dead if I did not amend them in time, I wrote 4 cheques that would have made 4 unpleasant conversations! Ooops

Hope the rest of the week will be better than the way it started !

People I wish did not talk !

There are some occupations that your communication skills are the bread winner skills, in other words you need to talk your ass off to get paid, like people in sales. But on the other hand there are jobs, that people who are holding them interact with people directly, but should keep the blabber at a minimum, though some are very famous for talking too much like hair dressers.

The list is my total whish list, of the people I wish will not talk while they are doing their job, so here it goes :

1- Hair Dressers: these are infamous for talking a lot, some people enjoy the chit chat with their hair dressers, but I whish they would not! what is wrong with you going my hair without forcing me into a stupid conversation.

2- Massagers and skin care experts: I was having a facial that includes a facial massage and the lady kept talking to me this is so annoying, I wished she would have left me to enjoy the massage without having to do small talk. She is my mom's friend and she gives a wonderful facial and I don't think she talks to any one while working but since she knows my mom I had to suffer.

3- Dentists: I think they are told to talk to patients to shift their focus away from what is happening in their mouth, but how do you react to what they are saying ! and the worse part is when they crack a joke while both of his hands and three other tools are in your mouth, not funny!!

4- Waxers: I don't know what they are called but the women who wax our legs (ladies that is), the process is painful enough you don't have to add stupid conversation to the list.

5-Drivers: especially taxi drivers, I don't want to talk to you ! I don't know you and we have nothing in common, why are you talking to me?

I hope you don't get me wrong, I don't see that I am any better than these people, I'm not a snob. But the work they do is either something I want to relax while they are doing or I'm too tense while they are doing, so the conversation is not welcome even if you are my best friend, and or drivers I like to drift in my thoughts between destinations.

Dreamer

(I have written this post more than a month ago, I was going through my draft posts file and found it, it is still true now as it was then)

I Don't know where to start, I don't know when things started or how will they end, I wish I had more control over things …over my feelings hopes and aspirations. I admit it I am a dreamer maybe this is what got me so far in my life, and got me the success in my career and maybe this is the cause of my fidgeting soul. I work so hard towards the dreams I have and the places I see for my self in my minds eye. The curse of being a dreamer is not with the dreams we can attain. The things that come with hard work but it is with things we have no control over, dreams that snow ball but we never seem able to make them become a reality no matter how hard we work, plan or pray for them.

They say big dreams tire the body, I ware off my body in the pursuit of my dreams, some times its lack of sleep, long working hours. It is so difficult to cope with the fact that I want it all ….for this life and for the life hereafter, I don't want diamonds and furs I want to feel that I reached my potential, I want to make a difference, I want to help others …these are the things I want. My dreams are many and I feel that sometimes I'm tired. You know I will take hard work any day over a night tossing in bed thinking and rethinking about the things about peeks I'm not able to reach.

I feel that I have to work harder, do more things plan better, help more people. Improve my self get more knowledge. But the thing I want most is to be in peace with myself with the things that I might never reach. I admit it my soul is aching; I feel that I must re-evaluate things in my life and reset my priorities, make a few decisions I just don't know where to start or how to get around to them.

The Truth about Cats and Dogs

I saw this movie again a week or so ago ( when I drafted the post), I loved this movie the first time I saw it years ago, but this time I saw it in a new light. Do guys really look for the personality and compatibility? Or is an airhead model their dream spouse, this side of the male brain configuration is still mysterious.

Examples of men falling in love with the personality are out there, but you don't see much of them, I see the typical beauty with little to no brains being the prize wife every one is looking for, as a single women I have may fair share of suitor stories, I got really mad when my mom told me what the mother of one " 3arees" told her over the phone I wanted to cancel their visit when I found out, but out of respect to mom I did not ask her to cancel, so what made me so mad ? " smi3na fi 3indek bit 7ilweh " and that translates to we have been told that you have a beautiful daughter!!

Is that what I am a beautiful daughter, they did not say successful, smart, well educated, socially active, philanthropist or even a simple religious. At least religious is what I made for my self not something I was born with (that is not entirely true but you know what I mean). All single ladies can share at least 10 stupid stories like that.

Again and again I wonder is it only physical beauty, family name (and connections) and income the only things, that are driving men in the direction of particular woman? don't they care what does she have between her ears ? Well I'm at my wits end a male input would be much appreciated.

Home Sweet Home ...

So I'm back from Damascus, the visit was filled with new things to learn, see and taste, I was planning that as soon as I get home I will blog all about it, but after a report and a gazillion emails on the issue, writing the details of the visit or even categorizing the events seems a dull thing to do and looks and feels more like work than fun.

The important thing is that I'm back home, I will share some photos with you from my visit and I will put in bullet points some of the fun, odd and crazy stuff that happened the story behind each one will be provided upon request : )

1- I can now be an official tour guide in old Damascus
2- Got proposed to …
3- Found proof that not all French people are snobby: )
4- A priest gave me a "masba7a" as a gift for my dad!
5- I had to convince people I'm not Syrian and that I'm not American

6-had Great food ...lots of it

This sums up my visit to Damascus, with luck I'm going to Turkey next month, if any one has tips or info on that it will be great.

Problem...

I seem not to be able to veiw my own blog ! Oh Wretched blogger what can I do about thy problem...

Sleepless in Damascus

I have been in Damascus for the passed two days and I think I will be here for another two days, the work we have to do is important but depends on other peoples courtesy to meet with us, and allow us to pick their brains as my colleague will but it. Thus we need to spend four days to do a two day job.

So this is my second night and I just cannot fall asleep, I have an early morning meeting, and tons of things to do yet, I'm not doing any thing besides watch TV !! this is crazy I have a good book with me I thought I would welcome the peace and quite to catch up on reading. I have reports that need fine tuning, and I always complain that at the office I keep being interrupted, and that I would love to work without the interruption. Yet her I am blogging not working.

The only thing I can think of is that I cannot function in this way, not being in a live environment, it takes a bit getting used to I'm quite busy all week and always. the extra time definitely gives you time to think and explore ideas. I'm just too insomniac to write any thing smart besides a shout out in the night.

I need Vs. I want

I read this article on MSN it’s about a "no buying month" the idea is basically to go for a whole month without buying any thing that is not necessary. No impulse shopping, no retail therapy, no going out and spending too much money in a restaurant, only essentials that you cannot live without. It is a bit extreme but it is an experiment for a whole month.

During that month you get to evaluate your spending habits, how much you spend on unnecessary things or outings that you really did not need which are too expensive. An upside for that will be all the saving you will do.

There are no guidelines for what is necessary and what is not, this is why it’s a personal experience. Each person gets to evaluate what is a necessary thing and what is not, " do I really need this ? " is the key question you ask your self before each purchase. Tracking the purchases in a small book or an excel sheet is a good idea as well for future reference.

I have decided to start from tomorrow! Its not the beginning of the month but I don't want to loose my enthusiasm for the idea and I will try to get my friends on board to see how much we can save in one month. And self revelation as well – you know me I cannot help it – a month of learning and appreciating the free things in life that are the most important any way.

Today is the day that I took a bold step and went to see the Mini Cooper dealership, I'm shopping for a new car but it is a necessity, I found that a Toyota Yaris is less than half the price of the Mini Cooper, so if I'm to go with this theme of Need Vs. Want, I'll have to go with the Toyota which is not a bad car, and forget – at least for now- about the JOD 28,000 Mini cooper.

So I will let you know in a month how are things going ...

A home made tag !

Well since I'm back, I feel like creating my first tag ever ! yes you heard me right, I'm creating a tag and putting together the rules for it and I will see how far it will go. But you know me I'm searching your soul and scratching your head kind of a girl, so fasten your seat belts and come along.

I will be answering the tag myself and the rules are easy answer the questions, try to give it a deep thought and give it your own personal twist.

1- If there was a fire at your house and you could save only one thing ( item) what would that be ?

I came across this question in an article and I could not for the life of me think of a one item, the thing that make sense is to save my wallet with all the ID cards, drivers license and bank cards, so forget about facing hell to issue new ID cards and drivers license and passport. I would most likely run to the book shelve and save my treasures, or it would be my gold ankle bracelet that I got from my brother.

2- What is the most embarrassing situation you have been in?

I broke a the plastic part if my heel one day, and it made a hell of noise walking on a solid surface, my office is fully carpeted so it did not make a difference only discomfort walking, but I had a meeting that day and I did not know that the person I was meeting was in an office that is all tiled ! and his office was the last office in the long long long corridor, and I was walking making the noise of the metallic part of the heel against the tile and the other one was a normal heel !! I was mortified!

3- If you can do over a part of your life, what will you change?

I believe that we learn from our mistakes as much or even more than our successes, and that I would not be me if I did not have all the mistakes I have made in the past. I was a person who would make a mistake and then beat my self up over it, loose sleep and really freak out ! then I made a conscience choice to think of the issues I have on hand as deep as I can, to make ( istikhara), take a deep breath and dive in. ever since I know that at the time of the issue I made the best choice I could at the time, so I feel better now even about mistakes or bad choices.

But the things I would like to do over, is finish all the unfinished projects I left, the half read books, get my masters right after graduation, and knock on those doors I never had the nerve to knock on.

I hope you find those questions of value and that the tag is fun to do.

I tag ….. Danah, Ammer ( vegetarian shark ).

Dima ( verbal alchemy) Qwaider, Mala2e6. and any one else who would like to do it : )

Back from the Dead

So my last post was about three weeks ago ! I cannot believe it has been that long since I last posted, or commented on other people's posts for that matter, I would read a few posts a day, but did not comment as much as I used to.

All this is due to being very busy at work, working for 10 to 12 hours a day, does not leave much energy for anything else, the thought of typing a post or a comment seemed to demand time and energy I did not posses, and after leaving the office when its already dark, I just was looking forward to a warm meal, a hot shower and my bed.

I did not loose the blogger syndrome, which in layman's terms its the " I'm going to blog about this" syndrome. But still I did not get around writing any of them down, and in my draft file I have at least five posts that need revision so they can be safe for human use.

In Short, I just want to say that the rough period is over and I'm back to the land of the living, back to the 9-5 flock, back to the having a weekend and a life for that matter. I will have some real posts soon and watch out I'm coming over to your blogs.

All for now ….

On the day I felt small


This was yesterday I had meeting related to work in Jabala al Naser. I have to admit I don't really know the eastern part of Amman and easily get lost there. So as we drove there from Um Utheina to Jabal Al-Naser I saw the scenery change, from Villas and elegant office buildings to colorless simple houses. I talk about poverty all the time and I know its out there and I'm not a rich person more middle class than any thing. But the view was so overwhelming and sad, but inside I was thinking well I do work to help these people, I do my fair share of my social and religious and humanitarian work.

Then we arrived at the local organization that we were supposed to have the meeting with. In their humble premises that is in coordination with the surroundings, and with complete full time volunteer staff! I mean I volunteer some hours a week and I thought I was on top of the world. Anyways the work they do is remarkable, it's not in the International NGO levels or UN work but remarkable none the less.

So yesterday was a big reality check for me. I saw people living in far worse circumstances than I do, have far less to give and yet they are giving more than I have ever done. I cannot believe that sometimes I see the work I do as a burden that I try to skip or cut corners from time to time.

It was just this Saturday that blew off all my meetings and work for the day, and took off on a picnic! So yesterday was the day I felt small and insignificant.