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Tuesday, September 11, 2007

My ten cents worth

I was asked by my friends to tell them what I thought about married life. The thing that I thought I had to say of value in that subject was: "You will be the same person you have been all along" now this may sound obvious and down right stupid! but I argue its not as obvious, every one feels that their life will change after the big day.

Let me be the one to tell you, your life will change but you will be the same, you will not wake up one day and be the person you have envisioned yourself to be. If you are not happy before you get married chances are you will not be after, if you are board or depressed you will so soon after marriage, if not worse off since you will add to what ever you have, to the disappointment of married life not being all you have whished it will be.

Don't get me wrong, there is nothing more beautiful than starting a family and being in love with the person you are married to. But first you have to take care of you and be happy then move on to starting a family. Don't go into a marriage with any kind of baggage it will be heavier than if you were single.


Unknown said...

First of all, I'd like to say alf mabrook, and I wish you all the happiness in the world:)
It's always good to be practical and rational when it comes to marriage,The thing is that many girls expect a lot in marriage, and they start to believe that it's going to turn their lives upside down, and that it'll turn them from unhappy and insecure into the happiest ones on earth!
and that they'll live the perfect life etc.but after marriage, they get shocked and hence the number of divorces increases!
That's why it's good to be careful when it comes to choosing/accepting the perfect one for you!
Best of luck again:) Nice read!

Maioush said...

well said Tamara as always, it's really important for a person to be happy and to take care of themselves when it comes to these relationships, marriage is a huge responsibility, they have to start compromising cuz they are not alone any more, they are taking care of someone else's too, there are expectations, but it's really important to be realistic!!!
i enjoyed reading it as always dear :)

Tamara said...


Allah yebarik feeki : )I guess no one tells the young ladies, marriage is beautiful but its not a magic pill, it will take work and commitment like any other relationship.


Realistic is the key word ! I agree people have to be realistic and take care of themselves first.

PŕōuđPāŀĩ said...

"Don't go into a marriage with any kind of baggage it will be heavier than if you were single. "

beautiful wrap to a beautiful simple and genuine post! i SO agree.

God bless u and urs Tamara, w yen3ad 3leiki :)

rare said...

You're right Tamara, & I'v read once n a book, that you should not do that step in your life unless you are satisfied with what you have & what you've reached! After that you can move to the next step in your life!

Tamara said...


Thanks gald you agree : ) o yen3ad 3aleki bilbarakeh


I'm glad you liked the post and I do agree with you.

Mais said...

this is the wisest thing i read about marriage life from a newly married sweet young lady :)

Tamara said...


Thanks that is so sweet of you to say : ) hope poeple will fin it useful

poetic muslim said...

sis, thats perfectly said ppl get married , with lots of emotional baggag , and even men do that , they somehow think marriage is going to fix things , it does not .

Tamara said...

Poetic Muslim

Welcome to my corner : ) this is a very common mistake, sadly it causes a lot of serious problems.

Anonymous said...

you are right tamara :)

Haytham said...

here we go , you corner is reflecting the second part of you; mature one, i really agree in this.
On my behalf,that i can't give happiness to my other's while i am not in my temper, but maybe there is a point produced form real samples,
many people has been changed after marriage maybe toward happiness cause of their is a leader in the realation that steering life pace to happiness. however it is rare ... while i hope to have one when i decided to get my next part.

Try to be the leader tamara , steer you life and your's to happiness ever after inshalla.