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Thursday, June 29, 2006

Are we addicted to Death?

Every day we hear on the news about the new casualties of war. Death …destruction ….bombs …terrorists…are becoming the facts and the vocabulary of our days.

Yet, we hear the news, like what's going on in Gaza and still go on. Go to eat out, go shopping, chit chat on the phone as if … if we are watching a movie not the NEWS.

I find it alarming that we are used to the news of death, that we feel that it's not real ( or act as if). We continue to master more emotion watching the World Cup!! You would here people screaming and cursing, feel so moved and effected by a football game, more than I have seen any one get moved with the news of dead children in Palestine of Iraq.

For me it is so alarming to see all of Amman moved emotionally by 22 men running after one ball for 90 minutes, than the death and killing of innocent women and children. An entire city will live in darkness for at least 6 months, they will have to get water out of wells, they will have not work\ jobs or trade for Allah knows how long, which will result in families sleeping on empty stomachs for a long time. And still to some a yellow or a read piece of paper in match will cause more effect.

I'm sitting in my safe environment, sipping my morning coffee and writing this. I know I'm not so much better than the rest….but at least I have a question in mind what can I do to help? And I get up every day and do what I feel is the thing I can do about it.

I hope this will make all who read this…think what can I do about it?

All for now....

Wednesday, June 28, 2006

A million little pieces

A million little pieces of glass lay on the side of the street; you know it was made like that, so that if it breaks it will break into harmless little pieces. But the nasty glass would break in a few fatal pieces.

What kind of glass are you? If hurt will you take others into consideration or would you hurt all those around you weather they have caused you pain or not?

All for now...

Tuesday, June 27, 2006

All the Parts of Me …

Today is my birthday….28 years ago my mom was in the hospital. and I have started my journey, till this day I'm not sure where it is taking me. But in my years I have learned where I want to go. and I have hope against hope that I have learned enough to know which paths I would like to take …

On ones birthday think about all the people and events you have seen in your life ( as well as why oh why I'm I working on MY day)

Looking back at the years, vivid visions of the people who have shaped my ideas and personality are still in my heart, I may not have most of their pictures in the physical form but their memories are still safely preserved in the depths of me, you know I cannot even say in my memory but in me …because at the moment a person touches your soul and changes something in you they became a part of who you are….all those who have shaped a part of my being, became an integral part of me for ever.

I still remember childhood play mates …teachers …friends ….family and even kind strangers. they all, many of them have put so much of their being into me ….that with some it is difficult to know where do they end and where do I begin.

So on this day in time I would like to say Happy Birthday to all parts of me….

*I have written this yesterday on my birthday …

All for now…

Wednesday, June 21, 2006

Are you an Atheist ?

The following article was written by a friend of mine, in an attempt to assist an acquaintance on his quest to the truth, I thought it may help many people (though not many read my blog)

Reading the article and truly understanding it, will take some soul searching and a truthful look into the depths of the of your beliefs. This is not an easy ready material….enjoy

Obligations of Truth

Where do you lead yourself by declaring it as an atheist? The answer to this question is that you don’t know. For no matter how much knowledge man can have, the answer to this question would still need more. So can any human being with our current state of knowledge declare the ability to set up the ‘truth’ of absence of a creator to the universe and be sure to where this ‘truth’ will lead self and others? The answer is NO. For human knowledge to be regarded as truthful has to be evidence based, only researchers know how difficult it is to derive causation to a small thing like a disease from its associations, then how would it go to the causation of the universe, no scientist with enough appreciation to the truth of his mission would hold the responsibility to such an allegation. The more knowledgeable a person is the more appreciative of his ignorance.

The secular west was so self reflecting in clearly declaring its ignorance to the larger facts of life. It offered the members of its system the insurance of living according to truthful knowledge reached by humans so far, bypassing to a great extent the injustice of being judged by human ignorance. And following the known truthful rules of universe serves very well in contemporary aspects of life, but there it stops. Regarding larger truths of life, its members are left unguided, leading their lives with their own misconceptions and human ignorance regarding religion and God, and ignorance serves nothing in truth.
So clearly declaring myself as not enough knowledgeable to declare this world as atheistic, probably I should make a detour.

Instead of declaring myself as an atheist, deceived by the allure of holding an existential knowledge that I don’t really have, I would rather link my existence in all its levels, proceedings, and abilities for knowledge with an existence that holds knowledge to all this universe and where it goes, ALLAH.

An existence not created by my fantasy to a greater wholesome view of the world and truth but an existence of which humanity was always given updated information in all the successive messages talking about the creator of this world culmination in the last message of Islam with its well preserved words of wisdom conveyed from ALLAH to humanity in the Qor’an.

This link liberates one from constantly being restrained by the small space of human knowledge or from being led astray to the mischief of the larger space of human ignorance.

It also Frees humans from being enslaved by non truthful gods of ignorance (polytheism) to submitting to THE ONLY who holds the causes of this world, rather than fighting the enslaving non truth of polytheism by another non truthful allegation of atheism.

By keeping up to this link, I know that humanity can get the utmost benefit of knowledge, a knowledge not only serving for contemporary life, but a knowledge that serves humanity now and hereafter.

After all this, a question remains for your to answer: is it truth and true knowledge what humanity is seeking by claiming atheism or is it a trial in human history to flee the obligations of truth?

Monday, June 19, 2006

Wrap My Words Around You...
I have never been a big music fan, and in not so resent times, I started watching what comes through my ears to my brain. in an attempt not to let any unwanted garbage hang around in my mind. Perhaps I will write one day about the that theory. But the fact stands I'm not a song lover and do not encourage other people to listen to songs …but I'm posting the lyrics to a song that has captured by ear….it does not have any offensive words and I'm simply addicted to it and don't you agree ladies that its kinda true ??
I'm not sure why I like this song in particular ? maybe the lyrics ..or the great voice or ...Maybe
I'm just nostalgic.... don't know I just like it and that's it

"Wrap My Words Around You"
Is it fair to write a song to a woman?
Is it fair play to try and win her heart?
Is it right to bring her sonnets
In the morning time?
To express the first few
Longings when they start
To express the first few
Longings when they start
Is it right to let her feelings
Rise to catch you?
Is it OK when her heart begins to fall?
Would you blame me if I
Wrap my words around you girl?
Would I wrong you
To say anything at all?
Would I wrong you
To say anything at all?
But if I wrap my words around you
Wrap my words around you
If I wrap my words around you
Would you stay
Would you stay, would you?
Wrap my words around youWrap my words around you
If I wrap my words around youWould you stay
Would it play with your heart?
Am I a hunter if
I send poems to please you?
Am I a cad if
I mean everything I say?
Should I even let you know
This song's about you girl
Just because I want to see you smile today
And my words may bind you
To me much too tightly
You may choke on them if we fall apart
It's not fair to write a song to a woman
Because a woman takes a song into her heart
Because a woman takes a song into her heart
So let me wrap my words around you
Wrap my words around you
Wrap my words around you
Till you stay, till you stay, let me
Wrap my words around you
Wrap my words around you
Darling, wrap my words around you
Till you stay
Would it play with your heart

Sunday, June 18, 2006

A Sense of belonging ….

I just have to write in tribute to all my friends at "Life Makers" the young organization we established almost a year ago.

At one time doing something good for our country and nation was a mere dream that we have all shared. After the agonizing waiting and meetings and hard work life makers was born. I'm not writing today about our plans or projects or work, today I'm only contemplating in the joy we all share in the sense of belonging to each other and to our mutual dream.

It is one of the great joys in this world that I think I did not really appreciate until yesterday, recovering from hard times seeing all those friendly and loving faces, seeing the purity of their hearts beaming out of their eyes…I could not but count my blessings and feel a sense of relief in their presence.

I cannot put a conclusion to this because its an ongoing story that we all write the pages of….I'm just so happy and extremely lucky to have all the Life Makers in my life.

All for now

Monday, June 12, 2006

PAIN ....!!!

I hear by will give a gift …no make that a great gift to whom ever gives me any good news !! this is so frustrating that I cannot begin to describe how frustrating

I have a killer back pain …I'm kind not to happy with my parents….I'm so pissed off that I cannot even talk to any of my friends ….I cannot hear any one complain about any thing or I will snap…I'm so past the deadline on several projects at work ….

So to add to my fury I check out a couple of bloggs on Jordan Planet…and there it is more bad news ….Jordanian MPs are pro terrorism Oh ALLAH!! Do they even know Islam ….I have no words

Rarely in life do I have no words ….I'm just boiling angry and I just cannot seem to cool down…..

I know I'm rambling …not even eloquently but I just had to scream it out in cyber space in a desperate attempt to ventilate the steam that is cooking my brain and clouding my eyes

That's all for now ....

Wednesday, June 07, 2006

Ever Feel Like Setting all the Alarm clocks at 6 ??

Impatiently waitingThe 12-year-old boy stood patiently beside the clock counter while thestore clerk waited on all of the adult customers. Finally he got around to the youngster, who made his purchase and hurried out to the curb, where his father was impatiently waiting in his car."What took you so long, son?" he asked."The man waited on everybody in the store before me," the boy replied."But I got even.""How?""I wound and set all the alarm clocks while I was waiting," the youngst erexplained happily. "It's going to be fun at six o'clock."

Is revenge worth while...?? it may not be but some times it sure is fun : p

All for now.....

Monday, June 05, 2006

Khawaja Syndrome

"…Tamara ..mmm..I gave her your phone number if you don't mind. I think you can really help her" my friend hesitantly reported to me. "Well, we could not get your number to her, so here is a number you could call her on" another enthusiastic friend said. this got me thinking !

Now from the top! Yesterday there was a lecture in one of Amman's Mosques and after a lecture a new Muslim telling the story of how she became a Muslim. She was a Jew, an American Jew, I did not go so my friends decided to give her my phone number. This part is actually alright, I mean yes I do speak English and yes I can offer help and guidance on religious issues. But the whole deal of her telling her story to the people in the mosque seems odd to me.

The odd part for me is for a (New) Muslim to give a lecture to (Veteran) Muslims, most of which are pious people to start with!! Shouldn't this be the other way around?! The new comers are the ones who need to learn more not us! Yes it's uplifting to hear this kind of stories, but the problem is with Muslims that don't have enough pride in their own beliefs, we should be happy for her and not happy for ourselves. We still regard the Khawaja ( Westerners) as better than us and thus when any of them adopts any thing in our lives like Islam, we are happy because we get a sense of comfort in the idea that its not only us who believe in Islam. its the Khawaja Too.

This is not the only proof and manifestation of our inferiority complex…there are many!! For example a lady I know was offered a Job in a Gulf country, but the catch is that is if she goes as a Jordanian with her Jordanian passport, she will get five times less than if she went with her American passport!! Can you believe that!! She is the same person regardless of the passport she carries. This is yet another manifestation of our inferiority complex; the question is when will we start respecting our selves and each other!! Rather than blindly and mindlessly seeking the approval of the Khawaja.

Grrrr this makes me so angry !!

That's all for now!

Sunday, June 04, 2006

To- Do lists ….

I was preparing my ever so long daily to-do list, while doing that a question popped to my mind… why don't we have a to-do list that is more about our soles and lives than about chores and work related reports??

So I decided to write a to-do list for my life. Things that I feel that I have to accomplish before I die….mmm not an easy task it takes a lot more sole searching than, thinking " will my boss have my head if I don't deliver this –mind squeezing – report before the end of the week or not??"

Consider your selves cordially invited to write your own true To-Do list, I mean cammon people you have made millions of them so far! even if not like me on a shiny piece of paper, that screams at me every time I decide to just serf the web. But you have at least told your self tomorrow I will do this and that ….well what if tomorrow never comes?( I know a bit melodarmatic) what are the things your going to regret not doing …put it on your list.

Now I will run away before I really go philosophical on you (Yeh I can)

This is a list of 10 things I must do before I die, this is only a draft nothing final yet. I have to start somewhere.

10 things I must do before I die

1- Go bunjy Jumping or Sky diving
2- Visit Italy (not with a tourist group)
3- Perform Hajj
4- Fall in Love
5-Leave a real legacy (or something useful for the generations to come)
6-Ride a motorcycle
7-Wirte a book
8-learn photography
9-Camp in Wadi Rum (yes believe it I never did)
10- Open my own business

This is all for now ….