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Sunday, November 25, 2007

Selfish is good

Selfish is good

My best friend, nay my soul sister has given me some pearls of wisdom yesterday. I called her up complaining about something and after a long talk from my side and her just listening to the end, she talked me through the problem and the jest of what she told me is be selfish.

Well at first this may sound like something very negative, on the contrary this is very positive, it means take care of your own needs first then the rest of the world. When you are well yourself you will be more helpful to others. Now I know this very well and I may have even mentioned it sometime before, but I guess I needed to hear it from someone else.

I have this tendency to need to help every one around me, not being able to help them or change someone's mood (for which I have a natural talent) makes me feel like a looser. This is one aspect I need to work on, at times it comes easy and I do put myself first, but I guess there is some kind of vanity in me that refuses to believe that there is something I attempt to do and fail! It’s a bit complex, I guess some of it is wanting to help others, but a part is that I refuse to believe that there are things even I cannot change.

So in some cases selfish is good !


Anonymous said...

Remember when I told you once in the past about loving one's self before we can love others?

You are not created to be selfish, you might try, but you will fail. The kindness in your hearts finds a way to push your needs aside and prioritize those of the people you love ahead.

God bless you my lovely sister. And a7la 3aroos

Tamara said...

Thanks Q for the sweet words : ) yes I guess someepople can never be selifish ...well maybe not all the time : )

Anonymous said...

well .,,
Its not a kind of selfesh , no ...
its normal to love ur self first , take care of ur self then others!
now (these days )in generall rare are the people who think of others and others feelings , to get what i want and need first how cost if that hurt others ,, ,, is the major RULE !!!
Nice post + Nice Blog :)_

Tamara said...


Welcome to the corner : ) glad you liked it.

Selfish has many forms and I guess I'm talking about the positive one. and I agree people became preoccupied with themselves that they lo longer care for others, so sad !

and life goes on... said...

YES! it's the best advice ever.. I have learned this years ago! Always put yourself first. I know it is hard and so against the nature, but it is the best way to avoid some of the problems that happen :)

Tamara said...


Nice to hear from you again : ) I totally agree it may not be easy but is the best thing on the long run.

Mais said...

I learned that too, and I don’t think it means to be literally selfish, but it’s simply a reminder not to neglect yourself for the sake of others all the time. Your best interest should come first.

Even when you’re a parent, I see there’s no harm in caring about yourself and your own needs sometimes, because it actually makes you a better parent somehow. Many get scared of doing this and think they’re being selfish and they are not good parents, but believe me being the part who sacrifices all the time and putting others needs first always is not fun. It will turn you to a frustrated, angry and unhappy creature which will affect those around you (specially your kids)very negatively.
A happy and comfortable parent = happy children
i hope that wasn't so off topic!

Tamara said...

A happy and comfortable parent = happy children

I so Agree with you : )

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